day 2 sinced the crash..

the back of my neck still hurt.. perhaps from the impact...
despite all the mess, still attended F.I.R's gig at ntu nanyang's auditorium.. hell was is a nice one.. was tapping my camera's capture button so frequently.. my hair  was loose..

i was chirpy on the outside.. mellowed and hurt on the inside.

James Iha - Take me down

and yah.. uploaded some pics on my fotopages.. fucking can't be bothered to upload all of it.

holy fuck shit.. do you all know what its like to go headlong onto a trunk travelling at say bout' 30 - 40 KM/H ? well I do.. and hell its not something worth trying... met with a brutal accident just now... 26th July 23.42... along jalan teck whye.. as i was making my way to xian's house from hao's... a right turn on a t-junction and i was on the extreme right lane... i think i turned too early too much resulting in my back wheels bumping onto the kerbsite... the van riocochet off the kerb due to the worn-out grooves and slippery roads.. i lost control of the damn steering completely and all i know and did was to stamp on the brakes... it failed me badly.. the vision of the tree got so fucking big... "HOLY FUCK SHIT I'M GONNA DIE!" was what i thought and the next thing i heard was shattering glasses and horns sounding off..... I was dazed... still conscious... but utterly devastated.. i had no injuries at all..  just a cut on my lips... but it scared me.. traumatised... perhaps you'd call it dejavu... i had my seat belt on.. had i not have it on.. i would have kissed the windscreen.. and the world a sweet good bye .....

special thanks to the indian guy + either your friends or family... you guys are great.. let me know that t here's actually warmth in singaporeans' hearts.. stopped and actually helped me with alot.. calmed me down.. taught me what to do and such... sweet..

rick, kev and xin... I AM FUckING SORRY ! I guess youo guys don't know how apologetic I am but I am telling you.. i am fucking fucking fucking sorry about the whole fucked-up incident.. i shouldn't have drove.. i shouldn't have even got the fucking license.. i know for god's sake that you guys trusted me thats why you handed me the keys to your mode of transport.. and hell did i terrorised it.... you guys will say.. its hey okay.. but NO.. I WON'T FUckiNG FORGIVE MYSELF.. like what I'd told rick... its not something that money can settle.. to me its a betrayal of friends' trusts.. and i fucking hate this feeling... this is gonna bug me forever i can assure... its so fucking helpless that i created all the fuck shit.. and i had to ask someone else to clear it up for me... IT MADE ME LIKE A FUCKING USELESS WUSS... i mean.. hell.. only wimps wriggle outta their problems.. and me ? i am not even given any chance to deal with it... so what makes me ?

if its only money.. it's a small issue.. you guys may not understand.. but hey.. its something fucking emotionally depressing... it made me really fucking small fucking helpless... but for fuck's sake... rick, xian, hao.. thanks for being with me... i might and never be able to repay such indebtedness... in kind or in any other forms...... ngor hai burden..

Pearl Jam - Last Kiss
this song totally sums up my story...

shuucks !
in a matter of hours, school's gonna start ! yeah yeah yeah.. and i'm panicky..
darn man.. another new phase of life..
another fresh new start..
another new environment...

starting is always difficult.. and i'm all alone.. again..
will try to make myself more amiable..
will try to socialise..
will try to attend lectures..

well.. for as far as I'm concecrn.. there's no such thing as trying.. trying is a word for wuss..
i'll do it.. and yeah i'm gonna do it..

always find it hard to sleep whenever i had a big day ahead..
was thinking.. just prayed.. hoping... everythings' gonna be alright..
somehow.. i've got the sudden urge to call ying.. just feel like confiding in her..
but she's already so far away..... time for me to move on...
gladly i will..

Linkin Park - NUMB

howdie.. haven't been blogging for quite some time le..
not that i'm busy or whatever.. just pretty lazy and lame argh whatever..
in any case.. was down with Naruto syndrome.. woooOoshh its one hell of an anime.. it really is nice.. anyone should just watch it...
 
just matriculated online and guess.. my timetable's rather cheesy..
tuesday and friday ... i've got a wholesome 4 hours of break.. saddening man.. but yada yada.. just need to find something to do...
anyway... chill...
tomorrow's the english exam.. or rather later on.. shall see.. didn't even prepare for it.
geeZ... till then..
 
Switchfoot - Meant to Live

geeez.. been slacking too much already.. no work thats why..
probably try to work more on my fitness.. heh

really feeling bored at times..
chill and maybe laters....

see ya..

travis - otherside

Woot ! long long long... bike trip down to sentosa.. wooo those bikini babes..
like what we retorted.. nice beach (bitch) ... haha
anyway was nice but my legs are really numb now.. blast it man..

smiles.. another day gone.. counting down..

Lit - Ziplock

finally got my NIKE sandals !
yeah went so many places before i finally got it..
its nice its nice.. and yuan got it with me.. heh.. companionship.

well spent the whole day trying to figure out if redhat 6.2 has plug and play, guess it didn't.. heh.. borrowed a dummy guide to linux.. i wanna learn to be a power user of it.

i'm gonna do it. got to work towards my dream rig. so guess i needa work.

cheers.

Smashing Pumpkins - the end is the beginning is the end.

went NTU for my medical today, was nice to be at my future school. some place i'm gonna spend my next 4 years. sigh.. what a long span of time.. but its good.. its good..

pretty boring day in fact, well everyday it is.. just hoping for something to blog.
maybe yah maybe, on sunday where we'll have a dim sum buffet.. thats if everything turns out well.

good thing now is robanne's up ! yeaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah man !
just some fine tuning and robanne can perform better than vitrioL.
robanne's running at default 133 * 12.5
would love to have it running at 166 but my pathetic ddr 266 won't be able to tahan..
just my bad...

good grievance..
smile aways
Counting Cows - Accidentally in LOVE

robanne is dead again despite feeding it with a fully charged 300 w HEC psu. Well, i guess the mobo must be faulty, if not WHY? I simply cannot comprehend, and i'm really losing my patience over this shitty thing.

anyway I'm dwelling into some IBM laptop distro shit, if you happen to need an IBM laptop do let me know, I can simply get it for you cheap.

Rather tired, just worked my socks off the catalogue. Good day, and cheers.

I finally found what's wrong with robanne.
its been power hungry and the psu could not provide ample power for it.
so thats what causing the damn blardy problems that i had. i promise you i'll
get a new fsp 300 baby for you. +12v rails no more fear !
just hopefully i'm crossing my fingers that it'll satisfy your hunger.

been working on alot of things, which sadly includes my fedora installation. its failing damn badly.
yeah later on will be driving to danny's house. been almost a year or perhaps longer since i last met him. feels nice about having to meet him and catch up abit; while enjoying soccer.

yah man.. i'm loving it.

3 Doors Down - Kryptonite.